First you clean it up; the punishment — and the crying — comes later.
Tag: serving
Saturday, August 14th, 2010
No Use Crying Over Spilt Milk
Tags: lessons for bitches, pain not pleasure, power play, pussy lips, serving
Saturday, August 14th, 2010
Protected: The Making Of A Pain Slut
I’m often asked if I really get off on pain. The truth is now I do — at least to the kinds of punishments Blackie prefers to give — but it wasn’t always that way.
I’ve always loved a lot of breast play (my nipples are red-hot express lines direct to my cunt), but spanking, paddling, clamps, clothespins, hot wax, rope burn, slaps, etc. — on my breasts or anywhere — and maintaining difficult positions was all definitely more pain than pleasure in the beginning.
While Blackie and I quickly discovered that I naturally became aroused by his inherent male powers over me, actual pain wasn’t so readily overcome by demonstrations of masculinity. Not even when combined with my desire to please him.
But Blackie knew just what to do.
As I’ve mentioned before, many D/s relationships are based on a submissive’s dependence. Not only simple acts of comfort or kindness, but a cleverly calculated combination of pleasure and denial.
For example, rubbing my pussy while spanking, paddling or cropping my ass, sends my brain a flood of conflicting input… Am I feeling pleasure or pain? Which am I feeling more of? It was horribly confusing…
But Blackie also used denial to make sure my brain and body were led from confusion and rescued — he made sure that the only time I experienced sexual pleasure was when I was experiencing pain at his hand.
Sure, I could suck his cock and get him off; but I never felt his hands or mouth or cock on me unless he was also hurting me in his desired fashion.
While he may have focused on one sort of pain or use at a time, the method was the same: pain always came with pleasure and pleasure never came without pain.
Until I began to have sort of Pavlov’s dog response. Eventually I learned to connect the pain (as in our earlier example) of being cropped with the euphoria of arousal and eventual orgasm.
No cropping, no coming; no pain, no gain. By George, my brain and body finally got it!
So much so, that when I was simply told to assume the position for a cropping, my cunt would drool! I might also be trembling with fear and crying in anticipation of the pain; but I was wet too. Even the next day’s bruises, welts, and sore spots became aphrodisiacs… Memories of what had been done, to me and by me; how I’d been undone.
Tags: BDSM relationships, crop, no touching, orgasm denial, pain as pleasure, pain not pleasure, Pinkie and Blackie history, serving, slave training, spanking
Saturday, August 14th, 2010
Orgasm Troubles
Some Q & A from your favorite piece of T & A; this time a round-up of Member Masters questions about orgasms…
When you’re under a No Orgasm Order and another Master insists you come, what do you do? …Is it the first order you obey, or what?
My number one order is to do as Blackie wishes and he says my purpose is to serve all my Masters, so I’m to satisfy both directives; obviously this is not possible…
Like many of my tasks which are (or at least seem) conflicting, I do my best and take my punishments for those things that I fail.
In the case of No Orgasms, if I please the one who gave me that order, I then take my punishment from the one who I failed to please by not having an orgasm; if I have the orgasm(s), I please that Master and take my deserved punishment from the one whose rule I’ve broken.
And then, in any case, I suffer Blackie’s punishment as well.
But aren’t you then choosing which Master to obey — at least by taking the punishment you fear less?
Honestly, I can try that, but there’s two things wrong with that theory…
One, Masters know (and Member Masters are given) the ways to manipulate and break me… Most of my regular Masters — at least those who care to have me orgasm — know how to take or force my orgasms against my will.
Two, any failure to please one Master means I have broken Blackie’s Golden Rule: to serve and please any Master to whom I have been given. The consequences for that are not pleasant. So even if I could try to choose the lesser of two evils, I’m outnumbered and outmatched on all fronts (and backs lol).
So, in all honesty, I’m simply living in the moment, trying to do the best I can — and dreading the outcomes for failure.
Does that mean an order not to orgasm will automatically be broken?
No, not at all!
I do try to do my best, including informing Blackie, all Member Masters, and any Masters I might be serving during that No Orgasm Order time frame. While individual Master motivations and desires differ, some prefer to respect one Masters rule. Also Blackie himself may choose to assist such an order by enforcing it at home and by limiting my service elsewhere — and some Masters who insist upon a No Orgasm Order will also compensate Blackie for ensure such orders are guaranteed.
…But even under the most strident supervised masturbation and monitored use, I am a greedy slut who seeks a release and can become so over-worked from all her use and play that I’ll suddenly, humiliatingly, find myself in the throes or orgasm. It’s happened from just breast play on numerous occasions. (However it happens, I can assure you that I am punished for my sluttiness!)
So it’s never a sure thing, and that’s why denied orgasms and No Orgasm Orders are so difficult and even painful.
What’s worse: Being ordered to have no orgasms or having forced orgasms?
The worst is disappointing a Master and, therefore by having disobeyed Blackie’s Golden Rule, disappointed him.
Personally speaking, however…
Both suck. But, in general, forced orgasms are the worst — unless the No Orgasm Order is longer than a week… Then it’s really dependent upon everything else I’ve been tasked to do during that time.
I’m not trying to be evasive; it’s all very subjective and situational.
I don’t understand how forced orgasms can be such a big deal — I’m not even sure there can really be such a thing! Who doesn’t want an orgasm?!
Orgasms are intensely personal things. To have one taken from you when you do not want to give it is an extremely violating and usually humiliating experience.
Plus most forced orgasm experiences are not simply a matter of taking or forcing one. …The combination of multiple intense humiliating violating orgasms is exhausting on every level and even physically painful.
Truth be told the whole topic of how orgasms are taken, what happens when orgasms are denied — how orgasms have and are still used to condition and control me is very very complicated…
The details of that will likely have to be broken down into multiple posts in the future. Stay tunned, as they say *wink*
Tags: Forced Orgasms, orgasm denial, serving, supervised masturbation
Friday, July 30th, 2010
Protected: Missed Opportunity
Member Master Derek sent me this photo with the following note:
Spotted this photo and instantly thought of our last party – however, what I see here is a greatly missed opportunity. Your task is to tell me what you think it is – what would your just desserts be?
Master Derek has also told me to share this — with Master Members only.
Tags: anal, entertaining, humiliation, lessons for bitches, more than two tango, power play, serving, tools and toys
Friday, July 30th, 2010
Corn Shucking
He loves to go for rides in the country. Of course, sooner or later he needs to relieve himself; that’s where I come in…
Tags: cock sucking, serving
Wednesday, July 28th, 2010
Protected: Can A Lipstick Submissive Survive As Livestock?
What follows is very complicated stuff.
Blackie’s introduced me to a man — a man Blackie says is part of my training because this man can and will force me to experience things that I will struggle with. It’s only been one (monitored, via speaker phone) conversation, and I am struggling. Greatly.
It’s not as simple as the flippant blog post title says. It’s not just a matter of vanity, or difficulty with something new; it’s the intense and specific philosophy this individual man has. …You might say that this has to do with this man’s particular “brand” of livestock.
Because all of this is new and raw, because much of this, I imagine, will be greatly controversial to many people, I’m restricting the reading of the rest of this to Member Masters only.
(Number one, this limits access to verified adults only; and number two, it should minimize any fall-out, including challenges of philosophical differences and “factual debates” regarding definitions, etc.. I’m not prepared to do anything of that nature. At least not yet. Not simply because this is “new” to me, but because my personal philosophy is that dominance and submission, be it relationships, role play, or unshared fantasies, are individual and personal; the only one to judge them is the one having them, or ones asked to become involved in them. And I’m still working on that.)
Frankly, I wouldn’t even be sharing any of it other than I am ordered to do so — both by Blackie and by this man. They want to read it. To assist them in their exploitation of my head, psyche, and soul, no doubt. And, as most of my lessons have indicated, to make certain that I understand just what I am agreeing to, if and when it should come to that.
Tags: humiliation, lessons for bitches, lipstick submissives (tm), livestock, power play, serving
Monday, July 26th, 2010
Protected: Just A Hole: Face Fucking
The degradation of having my face fucked can be pretty extreme, especially when you’re being called a whore, a cunt, a bitch…
Rough deepthroat action brought to you by PornHub
This past weekend, Blackie & Marc enjoyed fucking my face — and because I’m on a No Orgasm Order (until tonight?), they made the most of the situation. Not only did they take turns exploiting the hole in my face, but they humiliated me for my wet, aching and needy cunt.
Tags: cock sucking, humiliation, more than two tango, power play, serving
Friday, July 23rd, 2010
Used
Gags are great for public use, when you need to minimize (at least some of the) noise.
Image via Curves n Lights.
Tags: ball gag, hair pulling, power play, serving, tools and toys
Thursday, July 15th, 2010
Busy At The Office
Which, for this girl, isn’t always what you think *wink*
(I go down, even when the elevator is going up!)
Tags: cock sucking, serving
