I will go.
Photo by Alina Lebedeva
Tag: BDSM relationships
Thursday, September 2nd, 2010
Wherever You Lead
Tags: BDSM relationships, blindfolded, lingerie, lipstick submissives (tm), sub space is divine
Wednesday, September 1st, 2010
Protected: Blackie Is A Terrible Romantic
This weekend Blackie and I are celebrating a personal anniversary: the first time we made love.
If you think I’ve titled this post out of the age-old female complaint that men are not romantics, that they forget such things as anniversaries, au contraire!
Blackie remembers everything.
Tags: BDSM relationships, no touching, phone sex availability, power play
Saturday, August 14th, 2010
Protected: The Making Of A Pain Slut
I’m often asked if I really get off on pain. The truth is now I do — at least to the kinds of punishments Blackie prefers to give — but it wasn’t always that way.
I’ve always loved a lot of breast play (my nipples are red-hot express lines direct to my cunt), but spanking, paddling, clamps, clothespins, hot wax, rope burn, slaps, etc. — on my breasts or anywhere — and maintaining difficult positions was all definitely more pain than pleasure in the beginning.
While Blackie and I quickly discovered that I naturally became aroused by his inherent male powers over me, actual pain wasn’t so readily overcome by demonstrations of masculinity. Not even when combined with my desire to please him.
But Blackie knew just what to do.
As I’ve mentioned before, many D/s relationships are based on a submissive’s dependence. Not only simple acts of comfort or kindness, but a cleverly calculated combination of pleasure and denial.
For example, rubbing my pussy while spanking, paddling or cropping my ass, sends my brain a flood of conflicting input… Am I feeling pleasure or pain? Which am I feeling more of? It was horribly confusing…
But Blackie also used denial to make sure my brain and body were led from confusion and rescued — he made sure that the only time I experienced sexual pleasure was when I was experiencing pain at his hand.
Sure, I could suck his cock and get him off; but I never felt his hands or mouth or cock on me unless he was also hurting me in his desired fashion.
While he may have focused on one sort of pain or use at a time, the method was the same: pain always came with pleasure and pleasure never came without pain.
Until I began to have sort of Pavlov’s dog response. Eventually I learned to connect the pain (as in our earlier example) of being cropped with the euphoria of arousal and eventual orgasm.
No cropping, no coming; no pain, no gain. By George, my brain and body finally got it!
So much so, that when I was simply told to assume the position for a cropping, my cunt would drool! I might also be trembling with fear and crying in anticipation of the pain; but I was wet too. Even the next day’s bruises, welts, and sore spots became aphrodisiacs… Memories of what had been done, to me and by me; how I’d been undone.
Tags: BDSM relationships, crop, no touching, orgasm denial, pain as pleasure, pain not pleasure, Pinkie and Blackie history, serving, slave training, spanking
Tuesday, July 27th, 2010
Little Things Demean A Lot
Like being all dressed up for your dinner date and having to wait for your boyfriend, being stripped, bound and blindfolded, sitting accessible on display yet just waiting to be used can be quite maddening.
…It’s made terribly worse if you are waiting so and you can hear the movements and activities of others.
Life does indeed go on without you.
It drives home the point that you are nothing more than a toy, a diversion; that you have nothing better to do that just wait until he wishes to play with you.
Tags: BDSM relationships, blindfolded, bound, humiliation, nipples, pussy lips, tied up
Tuesday, July 27th, 2010
The Eyes Have It
Masters and dominating males my have the “ayes” to determine just what happens, but often it wouldn’t mean is much if the eyes weren’t there to display the vulnerability, the pain, the consent, the fear…
The eyes may have it; but the “nays” have it far worse.
Refusing, resisting, is worse than futile; it hurts!
Thursday, May 27th, 2010
This Was My First Leash & Collar
Like in this photo from GirlFolio, my first experience with a leash and collar was nothing fancy, nothing planned, and it certainly wasn’t all dark & scary looking…
Getting dressed one morning for work, I’d simply began messing around with Blackie, trying to get a little attention from him — some sexual attention. I was brat-ish, prancing myself in various forms of undress in front of him, teasing him that he should be late for work.
When he paid me no mind, I reached for the white shirt he’d so carefully pressed, slid it on, but left it unbuttoned and open, and teased him while he shaved at the sink.
When I still didn’t get any reaction from him, I behaved even more like a spoiled brat. I got his tie, placed it around my neck, made a loose knot and started swinging the tail of tie around like a burlesque stripper would a feather boa, and, other hand on my nip, I taunted him that a real man would pounce all over this.
I caught his eye in the mirror before he turned to face me slowly — I saw a spark there and thought I was going to get my way, so I giggled and backed up towards the bedroom.
He charged after me, grabbed me by the tie, then grabbed another handful of my hair and drew me close. Still pulling my hair, he tipped my head back and said, “You wanted my attention, spoiled brat, now you’ve got it.”
I thought he was going to kiss me — but he let go of my hair and led me by the tie to the bed, where he then sat down. He looked at me intensely. I was excited, expecting a divine session of being ravaged on the bed. But instead — in an instant — he’d dropped the tie and flipped me over his knee.
Over my girdle he spanked my bottom. Hard.
I yelp and squirmed in shock — then anger. But he held onto me with one arm, locking me in place for the bare handed spankings that continued to come.
He said nothing until he was done. When he let me up, all he said was “I told you now was not the time; maybe next time you’ll listen to me.”
Then he returned to the bathroom to restart his shave, but he ducked his head back into the bedroom for a minute to say, “Wear the shirt & tie today; I’ll meet you for lunch at your office at 12:30.”
And I stood there too stunned to say anything.
(To be continued.)
Tags: BDSM relationships, pain not pleasure, Pinkie and Blackie history, power play, spanking
Wednesday, May 26th, 2010
Keeping Me On My Toes
Still no word from Blackie. And now I’m afraid I’m not scoring any points with a phone Master B…
I’m not responding promptly enough to messages and racking up what I fear will be one hell of a punishment on my ass. It’s not that I’m not trying — heaven knows I am! But the usual beginning of the work week at my consulting company and servicing a new phone Master is keeping me on my toes.
Even with my ample tits and ass, it feels like there’s just not enough of me to go around!
But there’s this voice in my ear…
Blackie’s voice (at least I’m hearing his voice somehow) and it’s reminding me that it doesn’t matter how difficult it all is: I’m here to serve — and promptly.
Failure shouldn’t be an option — though failure does provide opportunity for those I serve.
So I’m dancing as fast as I can, as fast as my shackles will let me.
Image credits: Photograph by Sofia Karla, found via S & M = Smoke & Mirrors.
Tags: ankle cuffs, BDSM relationships, serving, shoes, toes and feet
Monday, May 24th, 2010
Twisting In The Wind
Still no word from Blackie and I feel like I’m left twisting in the wind.
I desperately want to get back to this:
Do you think a gift would help? These Caged Mother-of-Pearl Cufflinks look like something Blackie would enjoy wearing…
Image credits: Nude, bound & hung in tree, via Public Disgrace; submissive female with Master, Belonging by David Samson.
Tags: BDSM relationships, black shopping, bound, tied up
Sunday, May 23rd, 2010
Protected: Nervous Chatter
When I get nervous, I become a chatter-box. At least when it comes to my personal sex life.
In business, I’m stoic — bitchy, even. I realize the power of silence — my silence. And I use it to my advantage. But when it comes to the silence of a Master, I can’t seem to shut up. I want approval, to be reassured… I chatter to make sure no one’s forgotten about me.
So while I wait to hear from Blackie about this whole mess I’ve made, you can expect a lot of postings here at the blog.
So far all I know I know from Marc — and aside from his promise-threat, all I’ve heard it that they won’t be home until the middle of the week at the earliest. That leaves me with a lot of nervous chatter time.
Unless you’re going to make me shut up…
Schedule and other info for Member Masters below.
PS Oh, and my rates increase on Monday; Member Masters always get discounts (and specials too).
Saturday, May 22nd, 2010
Of Darkness & Light
Over at Clit-Orations, Nikki Nines writes a long — but most excellent — piece about the mistaken perceptions about what Gothic is, and how that relates to BDSM:
Gothic isn’t all dark pessimism; like the architecture, the true philosophy of “Gothic” reaches for the heavens.
…When those self-described Gothic persons only see or believe in “darkness” and “gloom” without reaching, without romance, they’ve made it as base as fucking.
…When people forget to reach for (let alone acknowledge) the light, they miss the beauty. But I thrill at such purpose of discovery.
Tags: BDSM relationships, power play
